Analysys of second draft, with audience feedback.

We showed our second draft to an audience recently (the second draft is embedded below)

Evaluation of first draft

As this draft focuses on typography in the evaluation I will only discuss typography. I was pleased with the titles that were used in the opening, I felt we had a variety of titles but still kept a reocurring theme throughout the opening, we had some unique titles such as the name of an actor appearing on the license plate of a car. We need to increase the number of titles in the scene. I did try and implement more titles into the opening but due to a lack of shots in which to place titles we could not add many. This means that we need to add in some scenes, when filming if we consider titles while choosing where and when to film from then we can add many more titles into the scene. I plan on analysing a real text to see the number of titles in a real film opening and at what times these titles are placed in the scene and to gain some inspiration of scenes we can film to add titles into.

Feedback from audience.

"Nice fonts"

"Wasn’t able to read it said sean kim on the number plate."

We are considering adding a flare to the license plate to highlight the title

"Creative imbedded title ideas"

"Nice story although I had no idea what was going on and was very confused by most thing that happened"

This is an issue that we are aware of, after we have refilmed the middle of the opening we hope that this will no longer be an issue.

In comparison to the mark scheme, and Mr. Wroe's feedback.

Due to the rest of the mark scheme being covered in my previous evaluation of our first draft and the only thing that has changed from the previous draft, to see the previous comparison to other areas of the markscheme I have provided a link to the evaluation of our first draft, at the end of this blogpost, this contains all other areas of the markscheme.

Using titles appropriately. [Felt that title board interupted the general flow of the opening, more titles used and some titles were not displayed for long enough, Titles used are good and some unique ones (license plate)]

The titles that were used we are happy with as a group, there is one title "Jay Ferguson" that does not appear on the screen for long enough and appears rushed.

What we need to improve on..

• We need to refilm the middle scenes as the audiences can't understand what is happening in the scene
• More titles so we need to add in some shots where titles can be added

The following is a list of things that still need to be improved on from the first draft.

Wider range of shot distance's and camera angles

• e.g at the start of the chase scene when Sean reached the canal, we could use a dutch/cant angle to create a feeling of something being wrong
•  I feel like we had a majority of medium shots it would be good to shoot a few extreme close ups or extreme wide shots

Variance of shot transitions, established from feedback some different transitions other than the blurred transition.

A more realistic soundtrack, as opposed to just a constant song we need to add more ambient sound such as footsteps, cars, breathing e.t.c

Although it isn't a particular area for improvement we are also going to change the effect of the disappearing effect as we feel that it could add to the opening.

 Evaluation of first draft: http://goo.gl/NjUhj